Alright so i had to write an initial position paper for my Psychology of Gender class... Here is what i came up with:
When it comes to differences between men and women, I believe there are three main distinctions. The biggest difference, in my opinion, is that of anatomy. The physical differences have much broader range than that of personalities or roles. This brings me to the next major diversity that I observe: roles. Because I am a religious woman, I strongly uphold the gender roles as outlined in The Family: A Proclamation to the World. I believe that because of our physical and spiritual make up, as gender is an eternal trait, we have tendencies that typically come more naturally to one gender than to another. The last difference that I note is one of intent or attitude. This is where most stereotypes are generated. Although often exaggerated to extremes, I believe many stereotypes are based on loose fact. Women tend to heed and express their emotions more than men and have a propensity to handle situations differently as well. Although one gender is not limited to such attitudes nor actions, a decent amount of individuals within the gender represent the stereotype.
I was not raised in the traditional family, but rather as an only child with a single mom and many complexities of some dads/moms and siblings. Also included in my family mix are half brothers, my deceased father, and grandparents or cousins/aunts executing essential roles. These dynamics have shaped many of my sex and gender views.
I have experienced a fascinating internal pull of desires between wanting to fulfill the stereotype of traditional woman and longing to perform the role of woman that I was raised on. I am eternally grateful for my wonderful mother and family, but I have always had a battle of occasionally wanting ‘traditional’. In the end, I seem to stay true to my upbringing. I plan to obtain a Doctorate of Psychology, and intend for my husband to have as much involvement with chores and child-raising as I do. As it seems, this goes against the stereotypical family. Often times, when I share such aspirations, I am given a, “good for you!” or “what makes you want that?” This can become frustrating because I was raised with my family or the ‘norm’ to me, and what is ‘traditional’ as two different outlooks.
My female role models have taught me that women should always be empowered, yet not outspoken, independent and reliable, but lady-like at the same time. For this, I have been at times named a ‘feminist’. I don’t care to label my beliefs or views, but I suppose others find security in separating me from the ‘norm’. I love the movement our world is currently facing where women are gaining a voice and respect in both the home and workplace. But it also concerns me that many women are using their voice to become more selfish and abandon their responsibility as mother and nurturer while chasing personal gains such as excessive travel, careers, or a new mate.
I am interested in the psychology of gender because, as mentioned above, I still lack some surety of my stance. I want to explore my own beliefs further and the assumptions and implications that follow them. I also want to be able to better understand others’ positions on the topic and how they approach sex and gender.
without getting started on my own tirade... i think there's a lot to be said for women and the many roles we can adapt to compared to what we are generally inclined to do. much of what we've adapted to has been out of necessity (i.e. working during war when men were off fighting) and has turned into more preference than necessity. Yet, for many women, there is still the pull to be home and raise kids/create & maintain the household. Responsibilities that men do not have. I'll have to go re-read the Proclamation to see what it says men are supposed to do. I think there's some emotionality in there isn't there?
ReplyDeleteregardless, i think the challenge (and my personal suggestion) is to have men face societal pressure to adapt to the requirements of the home in the same way women have adapted to the requirement/opportunities to work outside of the home.
i think most women in our faith (and other more traditional/conservative-leaning faiths) experience struggles with our progressive society and traditional values. it's something we acknowledge a lot in my major. i think it's wonderful that the proclamation plainly tells us that men and women are to complement each other basically in whatever capacity because not everyone has the ideal family. at least, i've never seen a family as the ideal family in all stages of life (before children, with children, after kids sent to college, retirement, etc.). the proclamation acknowledges variety, and i'm thankful i can choose what's best for my family, given my role as a woman and a mother. if that means working part-time, staying home, or working full-time and going to school with kids in tow...so be it. for men AND women, the family should come first. i'll do my thang, my husband will do his, and we'll work it out.
ReplyDeleteas for single women, some choose to stay single, but some don't and their career aspirations are viewed as too independent or something or other for some. traditions are great, but some traditions don't thrive well when society changes. a truly educated woman is an asset to any household :)